The Sky Is Falling

Above: the view from my biggest kitchen window.

The sky is falling, and I don't mean snow: for the first time ever, I agree with Newt Gingrich.

Also, the sky is falling. Seattle, as always, blew its' snowy wad too soon on the promise of ice and snow yesterday. The schools closed--CLOSED--in "anticipation" of this winter snow storm, and the wee ones stayed home with their grumbling parents to await their weathery doom. The snow did not disappoint, waiting until the last possible second to hit Seattle--this morning. After everyone took the day off yesterday. And now the cities of Redmond and Bellevue, our retarded half-siblings to the east, have issued official city statements of DON'T COME NEAR US, WE'RE TOTALLY FUCKED. The floating bridges are filled with jack-knifed semis and stalled Metro buses. People are stuck in their homes with nothing but their Tivos, the internet, their Ipods, and -gasp!- other people to entertain them. What will these poor people DO? The city of Seattle is officially a weather hostage.

The Midwest knows what real snow is, and the East Coast thinks we're a joke; I tend to agree. Oh noes, look at the cold white candy, pouring straight from the sky! Is it precipitation, or maybe cyanide in disguise? Does it burn like acid rain? Will it turn my children into zombies? I guess we'll have to find a bomb shelter and wait out the Snopocalypse together; if we run out of food, we can always eat little Tommy. I mean, there's at least 2 inches of snow out there, people--ARE YOU READY TO MEET YOUR ICY DEATH? We are all a bunch of weenies.

It certainly is beautiful, though. And there's nothing better than snuggling up with your sweetie under a pile of warm fuzzy blankets, watching the snow fall--although I can imagine a scenario where I'm snuggled up under a pile of laundered money, and that's good, too. The first winter of us being an US, there was snow. My bed fit right underneath a huge picture window--so we bundled up, got in bed, and watched the snow for hours. There was a lot of talkin', laughin', smoochin'... it was really the best kind of snow day.

The Esq stayed home today, after getting up early and getting ready for work. We were debating whether he should go in, but the bus never came, so he finally gave up. I gave him an A for effort. So since the man is home, I must go make bacon (that is not a euphemism), and get ready for hot chocolate and snowman-making later; the folks at 5800 need a snowman to represent! And since all the peeps stayed home from work today, it's going to be one giant play date, all day long. If you're anywhere near me, come this way! We're going to have a ton of fun. Snow!