Sep 28, 2008

The Vinyl Solution

Photo: I own this. You're jealous.

We've been making a big push towards Homeland Security in our apartment this week, and when I say 'we", I actually mean ME. To be fair, the Esq has been very helpful in transporting stuff and thrift shopping with me but, like all men, his tolerance for obligatory shopping and transportation only goes so far before he's all STAB STAB STAB. 'Homeland Security' is not just a failed national color-coded system that ultimately went nowhere; it's also the feeling of becoming more secure and comfortable in my home. We have acquired a kitchen table and chairs circa 1973 (octagon-shaped and lemon-flavored), a 1950's Danish dresser (or as I like to call it, "the 8-drawer refinishing project that may or may not ever happen"), two vintage chairs for our living room (late 1960's, I believe), a slew of new vinyl, and a bad ass poster from Manon Lescaut (c/o the Seattle Opera). Because when you think 'bad ass', I know you think of the Seattle Opera.

I finally went in to J and S Phonograph (on 65th, for those of you in the Seattle area), and it was the most amazing vinyl experience I've ever had. The owner, Jim, is so nice and knowledgeable, and the record selection--while small--was everything a girl could hope for. 99% of his stock is new, which is crazy shit, I tell you; to be looking at a Beatles' record or more importantly, the George Michael album that I bought (Faith!), and know that you're the first person to ever play it? CRAZY SHIT. I also bought the soundtrack to Clash of the Titans, which had also never been used, I can't imagine why. There were a couple of Hitler albums that I'll need to go inspect further, too; if I could get HIM on vinyl, I would die happy. Think of how entertaining it would be to play that shit right next to your open window in a very busy city. Then I would scream OH MY GOD HE'S BACK HE'S BACK! And then I would eat lunch and have a nap.

Other vinyl I purchased over the weekend to round out my weird collection:

Back to the Future soundtrack
Carol Channing in Hello Dolly! (Original cast recording)
Gershwin's Rhapsody in Blue; The London Symphony Orchestra
Terence Trent D'Arby (a blast from the past)
Mahalia Jackson, The Power and the Glory
Mahler's Symphonies 5 & 10, Unfinished; Moscow Radio Symphony Orchestra
Military, Fanfares, Marches & Choruses--from the time of Napoleon!
The Spirit of Christmas--Mormon Tabernacle Choir
Let's All Go To the Circus!
Earth Wind & Fire Best Of Vol 1
Midnight Cowboy soundtrack
Lady Sings the Blues soundtrack
Actual speeches of FDR and JFK (JFK's inaugural speech!)

I know, I'm a nerd. But I really love strange-sounding or funny-looking things; I'm very proud of my Mad Max soundtrack, which is quite possibly the most pointless album I've ever heard or owned. I might regret the circus music, but everything else I'm excited about, even the Mormon Tabernacle Choir; no one does Christmas music like they do. I also love soundtracks, but never thought I could get very many on vinyl; J and S Phonograph has HUNDREDS of them...I couldn't stop looking. Finally the Esq pried the records out of my cold, dead-like hands, and led me out of the store and into the sunlight; I nearly died from browsing.

My apartment used to remind me of sad crap and felt really claustrophobic; now our hallways are echoing--NO I'M NOT KIDDING, ECHOING!--from the lack of junky piles and excess furniture we never really needed. I might do a Snotty photo tour, just to show it off, but feel like the battery to my camera must be found first before taking any pictures. Sometimes you can over-organize... but I feel confident it will be found, because I put it in a really obvious place that I would totally remember... not the USUAL obvious place, but a SUPER obvious spot that I would NEVER EVER FORGET. This might take a while.


FreNeTic said...

I'm salivating, I want to check this place out! I think the Midnight Cowboy soundtrack would be nice. Lady Sings the Blues...I remember my parents had that album, and the inner sleeve creeped me out as a child.

And to think, I nearly gave away my Wrecka Playa.

WenigGluckliches said...

OOOOOOH!! Do you have before shots of the apawtment?

Snotty McSnotterson said...

Yo wrecka playa should be yo numma one prioriteh.

Wen, I will look for before shots, but I could just post a picture of a landfill and it would be fairly accurate.

Timo said...

someday - if you get me drunk enough - I'll do my Legendary and, more importantly, Terrifying Carol Channing impersonation.

Snotty McSnotterson said...

I didn't know such a thing existed, but now that I know it does, it's the only thing I want for Christmas.