May 7, 2008

Birthday Wish List


Photo: The way to my heart--cupcake speakers for my Ipod!

My birthday wish list:

A baby panda. NO, not to EAT. Not this time.

Artwork c/o Souther Salazar.

To be a member of this family, for just one hour.

World peace. Fame and fortune.

My own robot (besides the Esq); the kind that has feelings and will hug you, like Johnny Number 5.

Bacon. (Anthony got me bacon-related birthday gifts, like a wallet and St. Anthony, Patron Saint of Bacon--thank you so much, I ate them last night.)

Private birthday performances by these bands (A is the opener, B is the headliner):

A: Helio Sequence
B: Goldfrapp (minus the last album)

A: Scissor Sisters
B: Madonna (just these albums: Like a Prayer, Erotica, Music, Confessions, Best Of)

A: Cocteau Twins
B: The Smiths

A: Hot Chip
B: Daft Punk

A: Neko Case
B: Johnny Cash

A: The Specials
B: The Clash

A: The Bags
B: Throwing Muses

A: Adele
B: Mark Ronson

A: Royksopp
B: Bjork

A: Tina Turner
B: Stevie Wonder

A: Alan Thicke (a la Growing Pains)
B: Robin Thicke (c/o Alan Thicke)

That's a Thicke double-threat! But I'm just kidding. I would never see Alan Thicke in concert. I'd take any of those combinations, or all at once, or just one; either way, I'd be happy.

More birthday wishes:

A unicorn.

A hypogriff.

A Cyclops.

A dragon.

A mythical petting zoo.

Thinner thighs.

A Rewind button for when I say or do retarded things; maybe two buttons, since they'll get a lot of action.

A man. You know, one of those guys who is always being nice to you, anticipating your needs, buying you cupcakes, rubbing your feet, making you laugh all the time; someone really smart who makes every day special, like a barfy pink Hallmark card filled with money. Got this last year, so I'm covered.

World peace domination.

1 comment:

Sally Tomato said...

Happee Birfday!

I'll send you some Iowa bacon.

I think if you spent one hour with the Sedaris' you would find you can't have just one. Like potato chips.