Nov 29, 2008

Snotty, Shrugged

Ayn Rand: looking for love in all the wrong places.

While I compile my blog post of Obligatory Thanks for this week of glorious food gluttony--and head down South to get the monster--devour these links (and a possible rant), for which I am truly thankful:

America has finally to come to its' legal senses. We can protect ourselves and still be a dick without the torture or totalitarianism, no?

K-Lo has given me newer, fresher insights into why I fucking hate her. Besides the underhanded misquoting and evangelical retardation, I'm sure she's a perfectly nice, normal, religious, fearmongering twat who bemuses herself by pushing palatable lies onto the base of our lesser-known countrymen. I'm sure you know what it means when people describe "the base" in our country, right? "The base" are often the toofless, uneducated Okies who believed in Sarah Palin, and hope to solve all of our world problems by 'shooting the shit out of everyone.' Granted, the giant wooden cross they're carrying can't help mobility, but I assure you--they've been carrying that bullshit around for years. It's easy for them to hide behind something that big, ESPECIALLY with Jesus strapped to it; he had to have weighed at least a buck-fifty.

I'm so frustrated lately, with people being so awful to one another, and saying things like "gays are the oppressors!", and, "next time the violent backlash may be in response to a brave Catholic bishop teaching responsibility at the voting booth". I'm sorry, where does it say that a priest can influence my vote--like VOTING IN A STATE FOR GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS--in any professional way, shape or form? A CHURCH, I might add, that pays no taxes because it stays out of politics. Well ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, HA. I think churches should cease being tax-exempt the minute they break that law, which many 'brave Catholic bishops' did, and millions of other 'brave Mormon nobodies' supported when they publicly took a side in their churches and temples--a side that wrote discrimination INTO their Constitution... usually we try and take discrimination OUT. It's also disheartening that I'm related to a bunch of Mormons who voted for this measure, but I know it's because they follow whatever the church says without garnering an opinion of their own; they're like the perfect Mormons, with the lobotomies and the deaf/dumb/blind faith and the breeding. They don't have opinions; having an opinion of your own, in a religion like that, is pretty dangerous; once the people start thinking, they might start questioning, and who knows where that might lead. To more hate mail for me, I imagine.

By all means, STOP thinking about how your church is molding you into hateful-grateful warriors for JC, and START thinking about how much you hate ME. Your hate mail fuels some of my best writing, if you want to know the truth. *GRIN* And for that I am thankful.

Not thankful that bigotry > change or progress, but I still have hope. It can't last forever, something I imagine black people or Jews or interracial couples or Catholics or Protestants or women saying in the past 50 years; as history has shown us, this too shall pass.

Bush falls off the wagon. But then the article says "he's been drinking non-alcoholic beer for years", and everyone in recovery knows that all non-alcoholic beers have .5% alcohol in it; that's why they tell you in rehab it's a no-no. I know .5% isn't a lot, but it's also not completely 'non-alcoholic'.

Mark Steyn had an interesting take on Mumbai. I'm not a big fan of his (like, AT ALL), but I've been suckered into reading him lately, solely based on these three quotes:

Mark Steyn on Mark Steyn: "...a one-man global content provider."

James Wolcott of Vanity Fair says he asks himself, "how can one man be so wrong" when he reads "the latest dimestore prophesy from neocon jester Mark Steyn, whose occult powers of clairvoyance never fail to fail him.

Johann Hari wrote in The New Statesman: "Steyn's prose has a jangling musicality; like Ann Coulter, he writes in a demonic demotic that makes you chuckle even as you retch."

I can only hope that someone might describe me in that way someday, someone besides the Esq or a family member. "Demonic demotic", indeed.

And finally, for something funny: personal ads from an Ayn Rand dating website, seen here in New York magazine.

Favorite excerpts:

mattqatsi, East Dundee, Illinois
If I Could "Do Lunch" With Anyone: Ronald Reagan and Newt Gingrich... do I really have to explain?

Lewis, London, UK
I love
intelligent, sassy girls, particularly those working in consulting or investment banking (but other fields are great too). Really, nothing is hotter than an accomplished girl in a suit, as long as she is willing to settle down and have my children. I want a girl who will support my ambitions against the naysayers in society.

Rob, Stanford, California
I never “hook-up” randomly, I never kiss a girl that doesn’t deserve mine. I have yet to find a girl deserving of my falling in love with her. But “other people” are secondary values no matter what, so finding someone is not a priority for me.

HOT. If I hadn't met the Esq, this would be the platform--nay, the vehicle--in which I would find my heart's true desire. As long as my heart's desires include giving birth, investment banking, Newt Gingrich, Ronald Reagan, and deserving the love of a yammering self-interested neophyte who probably sucks in bed. Now there's a future I can believe in.



Manthony said...

FYI, there were a couple of those people with big Jesus banners outside of Westlake Center earlier today. I'm used to seeing them at gay events (Pride Parade, etc) but didn't realize they were so very anti-holiday shopping too.

Bryn thought maybe we should carry some signs nearby saying something like, "My Jesus loves you as you unconditionally."

FreNeTic said...

I loooooooove Ayn Rand. Where else can I get a hermetic philosophy and a soap opera in the same novel?

I'm not even being a smartass. I really have a need for that kind of objectivism, cuz that's how I roll...

Scott said...

Ayn Rand dating sites: Because sometimes, the people you meet on the internet just aren't asshole enough.

Snotty McSnotterson said...

Bryn has it right--"compassion"--but I think we should use tear gas and biological warfare. You and I will be safe. Say goodbye to everyone.

Snotty McSnotterson said...

Griz, I would totally expect you to be an Objectivist... oh, but not TODAY, no--but maybe tomorrow? Yeah, tomorrow sounds nice.

Snotty McSnotterson said...

Scott: I knew you would vibe with the Ayn Randiness of it all. I am rooting for you. We all are. >=)